Carry A Magic Stick

Watch the video, and then learn something under it.

Thomas Jefferson, George Washington, Abe Lincoln and Theodore Roosevelt in archival footage of a footrace in 1496 b.c.



Here's Fitty!



Two things I enjoy in my life very much are rap music and learning about the presidents of the United States. I would like to share with you some side by side comparisons of some of hip hop’s Warren G. Hardest rappers, and this country’s most gubernatorious presidents.

We could begin by getting the more obvious ones out of the way quickly. Barack Obama is like Eminem because of the color issues, Richard Nixon (who once said rap music could have been his calling if it was introduced sooner) is like gansgta rapper DMX for having growly voices, Snoop Doog and Abe Lincoln are both lanky individuals with unique voices and Tupac is much like John F. Kennedy, not for getting gunned down so early in their lives, but because of the many notable women that they slept with.

However the greatest resemblance between a president and rapper is the striking similarities between rapper 50 cent and the 26th president of the United States Theodore Roosevelt. Both born in New York, these two gentlemen took up boxing. Curtis “50 Cent” Jackson spent time sparring when not selling crack on the strip in Queens, New York, while President Roosevelt took up boxing to keep his physical condition in good shape while battling with childhood asthma and other ailments.

Both Roosevelt and 50 Cent have respective posses who have received a bit of fame for being associated with them. Theodore’s Rough Riders charged up Kettle Hill and San Juan Hill during the Spanish American War. Jackson’s G-Unit is a group of mix tape recording masters who sold drugs and start feuds with other rappers. Both mentored individuals who burned bridges with them. 50's G-Unit buddy The Game wouldn't agree to feuding with 50 Cents enemies, and Howard Taft and Roosevelt had a falling out which led Roosevelt to begin the Bull Moose Party. Both Roosevelt and Jackson also have similar nicknames. Theodore Roosevelt has often times been referred to as “Teddy,” and 50 Cent has the moniker of “Fitty.”

The most painful, unique and badass similarity between two of the greatest New Yorkers is the gunfire they have both been a part of. In 2004, Mike Tyson’s body guard, Darryl Baum allegedly shot Fitty nine times in different places all over his body at close range in front of his grandmother’s home. One of the bullets hit Jackson in the cheek, causing him to have a slur in his voice, which ended up helping him gain even more popularity.

Roosevelt had a similar situation happen to him while campaigning in Milwaukee in 1912; a saloon keeper shot the Teddy Bear in his chest after it passed through his speech and eye glass holder. Rather than getting medical attention for his wound, President Roosevelt went on to give the speech he had prepared, with both a bullet hole running through his speech, lodged in his chest. He opened his speech by saying “Ladies and gentlemen, I don't know whether you fully understand that I have just been shot; but it takes more than that to kill a Bull Moose.” Roosevelt lived the rest of his life with that bullet lodged in his chest. And 50 Cent, although it has given him a unique voice with his slight slur, also has fragments of one of the bullets in his tongue, a bond that the two of them both share.

I wouldn't go as far as saying that 50 Cent would be a great politician, or that Theo could sling crack. But they are both incredibly strong individuals whose characteristics gained them fame and respect. Teddy Roosevelt coined a term that is synonymous with his ideals, “speak softly and carry a big stick,” refers to treating conflict with peace, while simultaneously threatening with force. 50 believes in the use of a stick too. And I believe, that if Teddy and Fitty ever would have met, the phrase would have simply said, “Speak softly and carry a magic stick.”

Be prepared for a BIG DOPE POST to follow this one tomorrow. Bombs will be dropped like Truman.